We Offer Sean Spicer a Four-Year Porn Contract
xHamster is pleased to offer former White House Spokesperson an unprecedented $179,700 a year for a recurring role in their upcoming Trump parody series — matching his salary at the Trump White House.
“It’s hard to find someone so talented at repeating scripted, nonsensical lines,” says Alex Hawkins, VP of xHamster. “When we saw that Sean was no longer working for the White House, we knew we had to have him. We don’t know what he’s hiding under that ill-fitting suit, we’re willing to take the chance.”
xHamster recently cast similarly untested porn star John Brutal to play the role of Trump in their upcoming porn parody series,
Drain My Swamp. Blair Williams will appear as Ivanka Trump.
“Sean brings a star power and experience to the series that would be hard to beat, short of getting Melania to make a comeback. Plus, he’s very adept at hiding in bushes, experienced in cosplay, and without shame. What more could you ask for in a porn star?”
CONTACT
Alex Hawkins
Vice President, xHamster
[email protected]
“It’s hard to find someone so talented at repeating scripted, nonsensical lines,” says Alex Hawkins, VP of xHamster. “When we saw that Sean was no longer working for the White House, we knew we had to have him. We don’t know what he’s hiding under that ill-fitting suit, we’re willing to take the chance.”
xHamster recently cast similarly untested porn star John Brutal to play the role of Trump in their upcoming porn parody series,
Drain My Swamp. Blair Williams will appear as Ivanka Trump.
“Sean brings a star power and experience to the series that would be hard to beat, short of getting Melania to make a comeback. Plus, he’s very adept at hiding in bushes, experienced in cosplay, and without shame. What more could you ask for in a porn star?”
CONTACT
Alex Hawkins
Vice President, xHamster
[email protected]
il y a 7 ans
No one wants porn with plots or storylines.. just clear HD high quality porn, with no music either. This is 2017 theres no reason to make porn like they did in the 80's anymore.
Not sure why the hamster does
But if this goddamn fucking BULLSHIT is what you call PORN
YOU HAVE MAJOR FUCKING PROBLEMS
And deserve all the shit that comes your way!